So I am walking through the mall one day with my mom, and we see you, Hurricane Simulator. We were both very confused on what you could possibly do to simulate a hurricane. We see there is a opening at the bottom of your door, so you can't possibly spray water on people. Plus I don't think the mall would have allowed you to set up shop in there if it would mean people walking around soaking wet after they tried you out. So Sue thinks it would be a great idea for me to try it. I figured as long as she was going to pay the $2, why not. So I step in and shut the door. Sue puts the money in and we wait to see what happens. And then a fucking fan starts to blow on me. And that's all that happens. I stand under this dumbass fan for about a minute, and then the "hurricane" stops. Are you f'ing kidding me? This was the biggest waste of $2 in the entire world. Now being from the Midwest and all, I cannot say I have actually ever experienced a real hurricane. But I have seen that shit on TV, and I'm pretty sure it doesn't feel like a dinky little fan blowing on you. Hurricane Simulator, if you are going to claim you simulate hurricanes you need to step up your game.
So, being the good daughter that I am, I decide to take my mom, Sue, to the Dixie Chicks concert a few weeks ago. We had pretty decent seats, they were at the back of solider field, but in the first section. There was a big section on the field in front of us that was open....that's where you were sitting, or should I say laying, trashy old people. I first noticed you because the dude from your duo looked a lot older than the chic. But the closer I looked the more I think that was just because you, chic, were just dressed like a trashy teenager, you aren't actually one. A few minutes later I see you standing in this big open space making out. You then decide to get an old lady that's kind of near you to take your picture, while you are making out. Seriously, I think 15 year olds do that kind of stuff.....did you then go home and post it on your facebook page? It pretty much went downhill from there. You plop yourselves down in the middle of the field and begin hanging all over each. At one point I really thought you were just going to have sex right there on the field. It was really disgusting. I think you were both soooo drunk that you didn't realize there was at least 8 sections full of people watching you...waiting to see how far the security guards would let you go before they kicked you out. You eventually got up, and I'm assuming either found your way to your seats, or went home and done it like you obviously wanted to. But seriously trashy old people, maybe next time you go to a concert you should hold off on the booze until at least the concert starts so you don't put on a show for 100s if not 1000s of people.